When you are in junior high school and high school many things change. You are not a little girl or a little boy anymore. You are older. You have ideas. You have feelings. You know more. There are some things that you like. There are some things that you do not like. Your mind is growing. Your body is growing. You see and understand more and more every day.
You are a young adult. You are a teenager.
A very important part of your life is not about your mother or father, but friends. When people become teenagers they often find friends and begin to feel that their friends are important to them. Some teenagers say that their mother or father is the most important. Some teenagers say that their friends are more important than their mother and father.
In both cases, friends are important, and having friends can be great.
Sometimes.
Sometimes having a friend can be very difficult. Sometimes having a friend can make trouble. If you can find good friends in junior high or high school maybe you will have these friends forever. But if your friend is not a good friend, or if your friend is not kind or selfish, there can be a lot of trouble. There is some research about what makes a good friend, and there is also research about what kinds of people are very bad friends. I want to share that information with you, so if you have a friend that makes trouble for you, I have something important to tell you.
Psychologists tell us that your friend is a bad friend if:
1. They are kind to you only at the start of your friendship, but now they are not the same.
2. They ask you to give them something many times.
3. You need help, but they cannot help you, or they will not help you.
4. They do not listen to your feelings and ideas.
5. They make many lies.
This kind of friend is not a good friend for you. Maybe you should think about making some new friends. It can be hard to let a friend go from you, but sometimes it is important too. One thing that you should know is that you can make friends at many times in your life. If your friend is not kind to you, or is making a lot of trouble for you, and does not help or listen to you, it is time to go.
Don’t worry too much. You might feel sad and alone for a short time, but better friends and people will come into your life. Remember that you are a good person, and you are a good friend. When you meet someone that you would like to be a friend with, remember that you must “give” before you “get”.
You must give kindness so you might later get kindness.
You must give respect so you might later get respect.
You must give friendship so you might later get friendship.
Maybe the most important thing is that we all need to remember that we must BE a good friend so that we can GET good friends in life. So, be kind, and be friendly. Good things will come to you.
